bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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