Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
