When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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