So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
