It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
