how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize