omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
