Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Hippo gnu deer
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
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