I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
