I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
