Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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