i don't like sucking hair
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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