...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize