There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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