I didn't shave. On purpose
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Randomize