PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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