Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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