He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
