Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
