google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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