I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
