Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl

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(804): View more from Virginia

Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys

(1-804): View more from Virginia

wow, that really makes you stop and think.

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(415): View more from California

$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.

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(757): View more from Virginia

apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously

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(734): View more from Michigan

He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?

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(619): View more from California

You fucked that MILF against my car!

(415): View more from California

How would you know?

(619): View more from California

She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her

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(207): View more from Maine

I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.

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(863): View more from Florida

MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!

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