I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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