I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Randomize
