The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
