You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Do vagina's smell?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
