I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
