is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
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