Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
