like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
