i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
In America we eat man semen.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
