you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
