And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Randomize
