The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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