I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
