now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
