I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
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