The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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