Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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