if you like me you must not know who I am
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
