they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
