Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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