Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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