You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
50% drunk capacity currently
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I am one with the molecules
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
