I CAN MOONWALK!
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize
