No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Less talking, more tequila
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
