Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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