She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
