he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
