You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I have feelings that need drinking.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
