I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize